Out for our evening walk we pass by a vacant house. Unaware of it’s emptiness, some phone company employee has left a hefty directory sitting on the mailbox.
Sister asks, “What’s on that mailbox?”
“Hmm, it looks like a phone book.”
(pause)
“What’s a phone book?”
Brother asks, “What’s a metaphor?”
At this age aren’t they supposed to be wondering why the sky is blue?
P.S Though I’d love to claim that his question came from some high falutin’ source it actually stemmed from a quote in this movie.
P.P. S A metaphor is “a figure of speech in which an expression is used to refer to something that it does not literally denote in order to suggest a similarity.” Not that that definition even remotely helps one explain the concept to a four year old.
Brother’s Picture:
Brother’s Comment:
“Here’s what happened. The steam went up and the laba and by my comutations it went into the river and got all the fish dead.”
Perhaps the idea came from this recent library book???
Sister says: “Ahh, I love the smell of rain. I’m going to bring some raindrops inside so our house is sweet smelling too.”
Sister comes tearing around the corner, “Mama! MAMA! He’s nude! NUDE! … He’s naked!”
On this, the first truly hot day of spring the children have been outside with the neighbor girls dousing each other with water guns and water balloons and anything else they could find to hold water. Brother, soaked to the bone decided clothes were not a necessity and to the horror of his Sister and her company ditched them…. ALL of them.
I kept a straight face as best I could while extolling the virtues of clothing to the confused child and all the while my thoughts drifted back to our first day here…
Brother runs in, “Mama, we met the neighbors! It’s two girls and they told us their names and we told them about us. Everything!”
Would not a little chill run through every mother at these words?
“Really? Everything?”
“Yes! We told them our names … (so far so good) … and about Serafina … (sharing about the cat, that’s okay too) … and how babies come out of your bottom!”
Tired of breaking up one squabble after another, I finally let loose in a truly exasperated tone, “Could we PLEASE stop being so persnickety for at least FIVE minutes!”
To which Brother matter-of-factly replied , “But Mom, this game is called Persnickety.”
We say our bedtime prayers together every night. Usually Daddy prays and sometimes Mommy but on this night Brother insisted it was his turn.
“God, thank you for the toy food and goldfish at our tea party and everything else. It was a good thing you took care of us. In Jesus name, Amen.”
I found this snippet in my drafts folder. It’s from last year but it made me smile so I thought to share.
~~~~~~~~
Because Sister is 6 you will not think it unusual that she sleeps through the night…mostly. Occasionally a scary film or monster in the closet will rear its ugly head and bad dreams will ensue. For that reason I sprang out of bed at 2:34am this morning. A plaintive, “Mom” came from the room next door and I knew she needed comfort. Imagine my surprise at finding not tears but sparkling eyes… and a sheepish grin. “Mama, How many days until Christmas?”
Visions of sugar plums indeed.
In waltz Sister and Cousin. The kids have already performed a couple of songs for their adoring family audience and having tasted fame come back prepared with another. This time they declare they each need a microphone. Cousin will sing lead and Sister will be the backup. The song begins (a stirring rendition of “Jingle Bells, Batman Smells”) Sister leans forward, mic in hand, ready and waiting but as the song ends she’s uttered not a single note.
“Weren’t you going to sing too?” the audience queries.
“No,” replies Sister. Seeing our puzzlement she explains, “I was the Backup singer …. in case he forgot the words.”
~edited 6/9/08 to distribute asterisks evenly between all points so as not to confuse Julie and to correct a grammatical error because” it’s ” and “its ” are Not the same.
*If you discover a golf club in your bathroom just let it go. Exploring the whyfors of its presence will get you nowhere.
~~~~~
*After dinner out at a Chinese restaurant:
Will’s fortune: “Life to you is a dashing, bold adventure”
Brother’s fortune: “Knowledge and not doing are equal to not knowing at all.”
Sister’s comment: “Hmm Dad, maybe you and Brother should switch.”
~~~~~
*While reading this book you may need to describe a picture meant to represent a hole in the ice. Consider that “ice hole” may not be the best phrasing to share with a parrot-like three year old who hasn’t quite mastered clear pronunciation.
~~~~~
*I caught my husband secretly watching something on the computer. He was completely enthralled. Ooohing and ahhhing – practically drooling on the screen. “Ahem.” He looked up wide eyed in my direction and a classic, “I am so busted.” look crossed his face.
He was watching:
A. visual 900 numbers
B. YouTube videos of Baywatch
C. This
Only in the Kingdom of Geek could the correct answer ever be C. … Welcome to my world.
